Magic Most Fowl
by Maggs0607
Summary: Harry and Draco find their Animagus forms together. Harry is a stag and Draco is not amused with his own inner animal. Harry/Draco. Post-Hogwarts EWE. ONESHOT.


This was written as a prompt from the lovely ff-sunset-oasis and spurred on by a random tumblr post about Draco's animagus form.

The prompt was: DRARRY + "Please shut up. I can't stand how appealing your voice is."

Sorry if this went off on a random tangent dear, but I hope you still like this. I have to admit that as much as I love reading Drarry, these boys ended up being a challenge to write. As always, come follow me on tumblr mags0607

Disclaimet: I don't own Harry Potter but I do own up to any mistakes contained within this ridiculous piece of fluff.

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"Malfoy, open up the door."

Draco could hear the banging on the outside of the bathroom door in which he had fled to after this latest humiliation. He ran a hand through his white blond hair, sighing as he hopped up on the long granite counter and leaned against the mirror. He wondered if Kreacher would apparate his meals in here indefinitely because there was absolutely no way he was ever opening the door again. The shame was too great.

"Go away Potter."

To absolutely no one's surprise, the banging did not stop as requested nor did the raven-haired git on the other side heed his directions in the slightest. Draco contemplated putting a silencing charm up, but decided against it after he realized that the epitome of Gryffindor stubbornness on the other side may at least put on a good show.

"Alohomora."

Draco heard the shouted spell from the other side and chuckled slightly —despite his resolve to continue pouting— as the lock didn't budge not one millimeter. Potter still had not learned the subtlety of finesse.

"That's not going to work, Potter. I'm smarter than using something that you can open with a first year spell." Draco scoffed at the other wizard — of course he wouldn't make this easy — and shifted on the counter to observe the show he knew was about to occur.

He was not disappointed as he heard several different spells hit the lock with no better success, and then had to suppress another small chuckle at the array of Auror detection spells, accompanied by muffled cursing that also did absolutely no good. Potter was predictable in his quest to get in the bathroom just because Draco did not want him there.

"Why are you using Malfoy family spells on the sodding bathroom door?" The whine was evident as spell after spell had failed, even some highly advanced ones taught to Potter by Granger. It went silent for a moment, and Draco felt a slight hope that maybe the other man had finally gotten the hint to leave well enough alone. Then, he heard a thud and another muttered curse as Potter physically impacted with the door.

"So thick headed arseholes will get the hint and go the fuck away." Draco tried to keep the petulant tone out of his voice, but was it really too much to ask to be able to throw a tantrum in the peace and quiet of his own bathroom.

"Malfoy, open up. It really isn't that bad."

Potter was starting to get frustrated with him, and it was evident by the growl in the raven haired wizard's voice. Knowing Potter as he did — and after seven years of schooling, two years of Auror training and eighteen months of dating, that was pretty damned well— he knew that Harry was not going to quit until he tried to fix it. Gryffindors were famous for their causes and their stubbornness; this one in particular was renowned for both.

"No." It sounded huffy even to himself, and Draco inwardly cursed that something so trivial could have him this upset. It was like the universe was playing some cosmic joke on him. He really just wanted a good sulk before he faced those green orbs that would no doubt coddle him and tease him simultaneously.

"Draco, I swear to Merlin I am going to throw a reducto at this door and blast the damn thing off its hinges."

Draco shook his head. He could always tell when Harry really wanted something or was really frustrated by the use of his first name. He shifted from his place on the sink and looked to the locked door, contemplating if Harry really would destroy their home just to get him out. Considering past encounters of a far different nature, Draco decided that the Gryffindor probably would.

"At least you're not a white ferret."

'That fucking arsehole,' Draco thought to himself as he scrambled off the counter, shooting a spell at the lock and wrenching open the door come face to face with his boyfriend. Judging by the satisfied look on Potter's face, the other man knew exactly what was going to happen. Smug green eyes peered at him as Harry sauntered past Draco and vaulted onto the counter with ease that Draco both found ridiculously sexy and althougher aggravating.

"I hate you." Draco closed the door to the large bathroom again and leaned against the doorframe, glaring at the other man.

"See, I knew you would open the door eventually." Harry kept his tone light, knowing that he had to strike the right balance between pissing the blonde off and making him stop being so petulant.

"Only because it's 200 year old mahogany and I don't want any overly powerful specky gits with delusions of grandeur to bring our house down." Draco used his poshest voice and rolled his eyes.

Of course, Harry would just try and throw a reparo at the door and call it a day. It had been Draco that had spent the first four months after he moved into Grimmauld Place lovingly restoring every square inch of the official House of Black; and he would be damned if Potter was going to reduce it back to the rubbish heap that it was.

Draco was lost in his own thoughts until he felt the familiar weight of Harry's hand come down on his shoulder. The other man had quietly descended from the counter, and was standing right in front of Draco, green eyes twinkling in mirth.

It pissed him off.

"Don't touch me," Draco said as he brushed off Harry's touch and started pacing the spacious bathroom. "This is all your fault. 'Let's do something fun together Draco' you said. 'Let's tap into some difficult and obscure magic together, Draco. Let's try and become animaguses together, Draco.' That turned out to be an utterly ridiculous and tedious waste of my time."

"You are the one that wanted to do this, not me," Harry scoffed as stepped closer to the other man, poking him in the chest. "This was all your idea, Malfoy." Stepping closer still to get right into Draco's face, Harry smirked, "I still think you are just pissed because you didn't turn into a dragon."

That was it. That was the one sentence that sent Draco spiraling away from the last shred of composure he had retained until that point.

"My name literally means Dragon," he practically yelled, gesturing wildly. "I was in the house of reptiles. My Patronus —the one time I could successfully cast the damn spell—was a dragon. I should have at least had scales. But instead I have feathers, white feathers!"

Draco was bordering on actual hysterics as he finished his rant, and Harry had to suppress a chuckle at how utterly ridiculous his partner was being. 'Kind of like his animagus form,' Harry thought to himself. Thoughts like that would have the blonde actually murdering him in his sleep, so in an act of preservation, he wisely remained silent.

"This is bollocks."

"I mean look at you," Draco continued. "Of course you had to be a stag. Serves me right thinking I might show you up this one time. Harry-fucking-Potter, boy legend gets exactly the animagus form the world expects him to have. Life is so predictable."

"Draco I don't think anyone could have predicted that you would be a—"

"Don't even say it. It's too terrible to think of."

"I kind of like it." Harry had hopped back onto the counter by this time, hoping that Draco wouldn't get so worked up as to pull a wand on him.

"You would," Draco sulked, and pulled a face when Harry laughed at the mulish behavior.

"You have to admit it's kind of perfect."

Draco roared at that, "It is not perfect! I'm a bloody PEACOCK! An Albino peacock! There is nothing perfect about it. Of all the animals—

"I like the peacocks at the manor." Harry cut the blonde man off mid-rant again, and couldn't help but smile at the glare of thunderous rage that came upon his partner's face.

"Yes," Draco spat before continuing, "because you are the only other person in the world that those damn things like besides my father. Those bloody birds are pretentious and aggressive, they crave attention, and they strut around the manor like they are Merlin's gift to the world."

Harry lost it completely at that point. when Draco put it that way, the raven-haired wizard realized there truly was no other form his boyfriend could take that would be THIS fitting — the blond man was describing his day to day personality precisely. "Draco, please tell me that you actually hear the words coming out of your mouth."

"Quit laughing you tosser. I am having an emotional crisis." Draco huffed as he watched Harry roll around on the plush rugs in their bathroom, his face flushed from his childish giggling, and thought not for the first time how much we wanted to hex the prat into oblivion.

"Are you in a fowl mood?" Harry guffawed from the floor and watched as Draco eyed him, looking like he was truly going to reach for his wand. Harry watched as the other man leaned against the counter, shoulders sagging in defeat.

"I hate you, and I hate peacocks. I'm a fucking white peacock. I couldn't even be a normal peacock, I had to be an Albino Peacock." He could just imagine the humiliation when this got out. Never mind he had achieved something ridiculously complicated, something that Harry and he worked at for over a year.

Harry stopped laughing and got up off the floor, this time stepping closer to Draco and pinning the man to the counter where he stood. Harry's voice was gentle this time as he tried to sooth the other man's ruffled feathers. "Well, they are impeccably well bred animals. Plus, you could never be an ordinary peacock, that just wouldn't work at all."

It was the truth, for good or bad Draco Malfoy was never going to be ordinary. It just wouldn't fit in with who he was. It was actually the thing that Harry loved most about the other man.

"I'm never transforming again," Draco muttered as he dropped his head against Harry's chest briefly, leaning into the other man. "I am certainly not registering. If you think for one minute I am going to march into the DMLE and tell Granger of all people my form, you're delusional."

Harry didn't respond, but he did start rubbing soothing circles on Draco's back. Draco wasn't sure if it was to calm him down or rile him up in a completely different fashion, but it was working on both accounts. Suddenly, he got an idea.

"I know, maybe we can convince her to make my form classified. That's it! Due to the fact that I'm an Auror it should be classified information so I can blend in to my surroundings."

"Draco, you are a large bird with an enormous white plumage. The only place you would ever blend in would be at your own parents manor or a muggle zoo." Harry continued running his hands down Draco's arms, pressing closer as he continued to attempt to distract his boyfriend from the topic of zoos and animals by unbuttoning his shirt.

"I'm not going to a muggle zoo."

Harry had the unique ability to brass him off and turn him on like no other person on this earth. But, with the hands running down his torso, and Harry's stubble ghosting across his jawline, he was beginning to forget all about animals and transformations.

"Just imagine, you can go to the zoo — they let the peacocks run free—and you can get into all sorts of mischief. I know, maybe now you can communicate with the ones at the manor, you could become their leader, imagine a peacock army..."

"Potter, please do shut up. I am NOT going to create a peacock army."

Harry laughed at his boyfriend, kissing Draco full on the mouth to stop the growl of exasperation he expected. He pulled away suddenly, ignoring the small moan shot his way, "What, am I ruffling your feathers, Draco.?"

"You are appalling."

"I think the word you actually meant was appealing." Harry resumed his kissing at this point, sucking lightly on the spot right below Draco's ear that he knew drove the blond wild. He let his fingers trail down Draco's front, running over the bulge he could already feel in the other man's trousers.

He again leaned in to kiss Draco, hard and demanding as they often were, fighting for dominance and loving every second of it.

"Never, you are a menace." Draco pulled his mouth away from Harry to snark his reply, and had to bite back a moan as strong hands fully removed his shirt, and a hard body ground more firmly against his trousers.

"Says the man whose inner animal is a vain bird prone to squawking at people and pecking at them. I happen to be a majestic creature of nobility and..."

"Potter do you like just hearing the sound of your own voice? Does it amuse you to just keep talking?"

"Hey you like my voice..."

"No, I like your mouth, especially when it's doing things other than talking."

Harry took the hint and immediately dropped to his knees before Draco, swiftly undoing the buckle of his trousers and shimmying them down the blond's leg, taking his pants with them in one swift move. Draco's erection sprang free, and he could feel Harry's breath against him as he thrust closer to Harry's waiting mouth.

Harry teased by trailing light kisses up and down Draco's inner thigh, taking his time running his hands teasingly along his shaft.

"So, you mean to tell me that you don't like when I talk dirty," Harry said as he pulled his mouth away from Draco's thigh, still letting his hand stroke Draco in a way that he knew would drive the other man mad with want. "When I tell you in great detail all the ways I'm going to make you beg for it... How much I like cocks, and all the ways I like stroking them."

Harry punctuated his sentence with strong strokes that nearly had Draco coming right then and there. But Draco wanted more that just Harry's talented hands. He wanted his mouth, wanted him to chase every other thought out of Draco's mind.

"Harry, please shut up. I can't stand how appealing your voice is, and right now I would much rather you show me what your mouth can do without words." Draco's moan was breathy as he gripped the countertop, trying to draw this out as long as possible.

For his part, Harry took instruction and enveloped Draco is his warm mouth, taking him in all the way in; Draco's cock harder than even he even thought possible. Harry was humming around him, mouth working him in away that made him tingle all over and his brain fuzzy. Draco tangled his hands in Harry's hair, gasping as he completely came undone. He was so caught up in the sensations that he barely noticed Harry take his own cock out of his pants and start stroking.

Draco felt his knees begin to buckle and knew that it was going to be over in just a second as Harry continued to swallow him down. He gripped Harry's messy locks tightly as he came swiftly and violently, and watched as Harry took in every last drop, pausing for a minute before bringing himself off to a quick release just a few seconds later.

Draco collapsed against the counter, sliding down into the floor as Harry his them both with a cleaning spell and adjusted until they were side by side on the marble floor, both mussed and panting. Harry went to open his mouth to speak, but Draco cut him off before he had a chance.

"Potter if you try and break the silence with a cock joke, I really will transform and peck out your eyes."

Harry laughed as he nuzzled closer to Draco, "Oh come on, you you know, you aren't going to be able resist showing off. You are every inch your animagus form and you absolutely cannot deny it."

"Fine, you win." Draco grumbled, knowing Harry was right, it was a tricky peice of Magic. "Peacocks are noble creatures, and do have a certain refinement that other forms seem to lack."

"Don't you even start on my form, Pecker, or we will see whose form comes up lacking." Harry stood up, fully removing his clothes and walking to turn on their glass shower.

Draco shot up right after him, removing the rest of his clothes as well, grousing at his boyfriend all the while.

"My form will NOT be named Pecker, you overgrown deer, it's much too regal for that and I should have a name befitting my status as a most noble fowl."

"How about Cocky?"

"Most certainly not! You will not besmirch my noble form with such Plebeian names."

Potter just laughed, running his hands over Draco and making him harden once again. Nipping at Draco's neck, Potter whispered, "I think Cocky suits you just fine."

Harry finished off his words with a twist of Draco's prick and Draco thought that he might agree to all manner of names if only Harry would keep doing that and much much more.

And as he let Harry drag him into their large shower for what was sure to be a very satisfying round two, he thought there might be worse things than being a peacock animagus if Harry was going to continue to sooth his ruffled feathers in the very best of ways.


End file.
